Finding Hope

There are days when my situation beats me down and I lose all sight of hope. I cry throughout the night with my heart aching. I don’t want to get out of bed when morning comes because I don’t want to face my truth. I have to remind myself to take deep breaths so I can hold the tears back or so I don’t have a panic attack. I have to go into “auto-pilot” mode to function at all.

The hardest part about all of this is that I am aware of what is going on. I am painfully aware of my situation, how I am feeling and the effect it is having on me. But on days like this, I feel like my body is disconnected from my brain. My emotions have taken over and I feel like I am screaming, “SNAP OUT OF IT!” but I can’t move or react. I am stuck. I hate these days. I refuse to allow these days to steal too much of my life.

So how do I get rid of this depression (or get out of my “funk” as I say)? I allow my brain to take control and I work through my emotions logically. When you are in a funk like this, make time to get away from noise and distractions and find a quiet place to think. This may mean you need a babysitter or to reschedule something but it is worth it. When you get to your quiet place, take a few moments to be calm, take several deep breaths and just be. Try not to think about anything but if you can’t quiet your mind, direct your thoughts to, “I’m going to figure this out” or “I’m going to conquer this” or “I’m going to be okay”.

On paper, write down the things that are causing negative feelings. In my case:

• struggling financially
• marital problems
• feeling unfulfilled

All of my stress come down to these two things and actually I could place financial problems with marital problems because that is where it stems from. On your list you should get as specific as you can because it will help you come up with ways to conquer your troubles.

Once you have the issues written down, start writing all of the possible solutions that you can think of. If there is an issue where you can’t find a solution, it’s okay. Put a question mark there. You don’t have to have all of the answers.

The point of this exercise is to help you organize your thoughts and find ways to tackle the things that are bringing you down. This exercise will not solve your problems instantly and your funk may not disappear overnight but you will have hope. Hope is what brings us out of despair. It is essential for moving forward to find peace and happiness.

We often get depressed when we are overwhelmed with negative thoughts. Our minds are so clouded by the emotional response we have to those thoughts, we can’t think of solutions and we feel like our situations are hopeless.

Now that you have identified the issues bringing you down and have possible solutions, you can focus on working toward those solutions. Having a something to place your focus on is also crucial to getting out of a funk. You know on your bad days how you feel listless? Even committing to do one simple thing can help improve the way you are feeling. I put a load of laundry in the washer and that alone made me feel a little tiny bit better about my day (woo, I accomplished something – yes, say it like Eeyore).

So let’s review:

• Get up and do SOMETHING! Take a walk, go out and get coffee, do laundry, etc.
• Make time to find a quiet place.
• Write down the issues bringing you down (be specific)
• Write down as many possible solutions to those issues as you can think of
• Focus on the solutions and work towards conquering your issues

If you have trouble identifying the issues bringing you down or can’t think of any solutions to any of the issues then you NEED to talk to someone. A counselor can help you identify issues and find solutions. They are someone outside of your situation that you can talk openly with and that alone can help. Check out: The American Association of Christian Counselors