Enough Is Enough

This is not going to be a fun post to write, but I am fed up. I’m not just fed up, I am angry. Do you know why?? Because I sat down to do my finances and I am in debt.

Now, I am not so oblivious that I didn’t know it was going in that direction. In fact, I knew I was in debt last year. Last year… oye. Last year killed me. Last year was rough. It actually started the summer before that. That is when my husband and I split. For him, nothing changed financially. He went to work, got paid but now, his once stay-at-home wife didn’t touch it so, he actually benefited.

Me, however had no job and 3 kids that needed childcare. I was not getting child support and although I found a job and childcare, the job didn’t pay well, childcare is expensive and life just kept hitting me hard. I had never been in debt before and it’s not something I ever wanted to do but life happened and we were sinking.

I thought that I would be able to pay it back quickly because it wasn’t much at first, but flat tire after flat tire (I had 3 in two months), sick kid after sick kid, life wasn’t helping me out.

Unintentionally, I stopped looking at my finances. I used to look at them every week to budget and stay on top of things. Now looking at my finances made me feel sick so I just stopped. I paid the minimums and kept on living, without paying attention.

This past Fall things started to turn around and I thought I would be able to steadily climb out of debt. I was making money but I still wasn’t looking at my finances.

Today, I decided to sit down and restart the habit I used to have of looking at my finances each week. So why am I so mad if I knew I was in debt?

Because I didn’t pay attention to my finances, even though I have been making money, I haven’t been intentional on where I want that money to go. Looking at the numbers makes it feel like I’ve been working for nothing. I thoughtlessly spent the money on little things that alone didn’t seem like a big deal but added up. If I had been acutely aware of my money situation… if I had know exactly how much I had and how much I still owed I never would have spent extra money. I am angry with myself.

So tonight I am declaring a spending freeze for myself. Tomorrow I am setting up a budget and a plan to get this debt taken care of.

If you are in a situation similar to mine, join me in working to take care of your debt so the money you make, you can keep.

I am using Mint.com to track all of my accounts, bills, and spending. It’s free!